The second-greatest Trans Am in the world is for sale.
The greatest Trans Am, of course, was driven by Burt Reynolds in the movie “Smokey and the Bandit,” which is the finest film ever made about two rednecks and the Flying Nun racing from Texarkana, Texas, to Atlanta, Ga., with 400 cases of bootleg Coors while pursued by Ralph Kramden of “The Honeymooners.”
It has everything - the aforementioned Trans Am, Jerry Reed, Burt Reynolds’ mustache, Sally Field’s behind, sloppy editing, a diablo sandwich, creative cussing, a dog, CB radios, lots of trucks and a character named Junior.
The second-greatest Trans Am, the Knight Industries 2000 or KITT for short, was a central character on “Knight Rider,” the finest David Hasselhoff TV series ever made not featuring a jiggly Pam Anderson.
The owner of KITT, a car that on the series could talk, drive itself, reach speeds of 300 mph and fire rockets, is for sale for $149,995, a good deal if the car could actually talk, drive itself, reach speeds of 300 mph and fire rockets.
KITT is on display at a California auto dealership.
While I appreciate KITT’s indestructibility and advanced weaponry, I downgrade the car just a bit because I suspect it still reeks of Hasselhoff’s cologne.
The hoopla (minor though it is) surrounding the sale led me to compile a mental list of TV’s greatest vehicles while pretending to listen to my wife talk about something that didn’t interest me.
“Wow, this could make a column,” I thought as I nodded to my wife in what I hoped were all the appropriate places.
To not overly tax my brain, I restricted my list to just TV vehicles (though some would later appear in movies), which eliminates James Bond’s cars, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Bullitt’s Mustang and the Millennium Falcon.
In no particular order, my list:
-- The General Lee, the 1969 Dodge Charger featured on “The Dukes of Hazzard.” Let’s just primer over the rebel flag controversy and focus on the car, which could jump an outhouse without the aid of a ramp. Some say it was special effects, but I tend to believe it was a quart or two of Uncle Jesse’s white liquor mixed with high test. Extra points for the doors being welded shut.
-- The Batmobile. The forerunner to KITT, the Batmobile was chock-full of gadgets - a computer, a radar screen, an anti-theft device, a small helicopter in the trunk, all pretty swinging stuff for 1966. It was a two-seater, too, which meant when Batman and Catwoman went on a moonlight drive, Robin was back home polishing the Batpole.
-- The Cannonball, the train from “Petticoat Junction.” Though the Cannonball’s only route appeared to be the .04 miles from Hooterville to Pixley, with occasional stops to deliver Uncle Joe’s “medicine” to the Shady Rest, passengers would sometimes be treated to the sight of the three Bradley sisters swimming nude in the water tower. Enough said.
-- The Clampett’s truck on “The Beverly Hillbillies.” A flatbed constructed from the remnants of a 1921 Oldsmobile, the truck made up for its lack of style by being incredibly durable. It was already more than 40 years old when it toted the Clampetts from the backwoods to the land of cee-ment ponds, and it survived Jethro’s attempt to transform it into his double-naught spy car.
-- The Mystery Machine from “Scooby-Doo.” Today, van owners are mostly delivery companies, carpet cleaners, soccer moms and serial killers, but there was a time in our nation’s history when four teenagers and a loveable dog traveled the countryside in a brightly colored van jerking rubber masks off crooks who would have gotten away with it if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids.
And Jerry Reed, who followed the greatest Trans Am in the world from Texarkana, Texas, to Atlanta, Ga., once guest-starred on the show.
Coincidence? I think not.
Scott Hollifield is editor and general manager of The McDowell News in Marion, N.C
